TiaKisu's corner

[Doubar]

@kriss: Thank you, dear!!! I'm really glad you like the edited version as well.
Ehehehe, and aye, your quote is famous now. ;D You really read my mind with it and thus I just had to refer to it (couldn't have put that in better words than those you used, really). ;D

You included here everything that was missed in the show.

Aww, I'm so glad you think I did this justice, and that I could fix what was missing in the show.

MJ: Awee, thanx for your review, too, dear!

Ah, you're quite right about Sinbad there. In a way he's being a bit of a prick there, isn't he? Giving up on Doubar and shying away from his friends. But at times that's just who he is, and I am glad to know you agree with me on that one. Funny enough, it never even occured to me to have Sinbad think more about the horrors that Doubar is facing, although you actually got a point there. If skillfully done, such less self-centered thoughts would have also fit the scene. I guess it all really depends on how one does interpret the character in that moment. *ponders*

Anyway. Thank you a lot for the concrit! Indeed changing this shot to 3rd person narration had one major drawback: I was now writing about two men which makes it confusing at times to make clear who is being written about. I tried to do my best with it, but can understand it still stops the flow at times.

One little sentence I don't understand: 'And through Sinbad's tears he will warm the younger one when his skin is cold...

Ah, thanx for pointing that out. I didn't notice it was indeed hard to understand (guess that's because in my head I know after all who is doing what), but I edited that now. Originally I meant to say that Sinbad would be crying and Doubar would still warm him and guide him, but now I changed that to: "Through his tears the other will warm the younger one when Sinbad's skin is cold,", implying that though Doubar will be crying, he will still be there for Sinbad in this bitter moment.

I'm trying to find the right words to describe what I think of this one-shot... because I don't like it, but that's a good thing.

You know, it's actually fascinating to me how different your and Kriss' reactions are. If I may dare and simplify it - they're pretty much the exact opposite. But that's awesome. Because either way it means the shot evoked an emotion, and that's really what I wanted to do with it.

[Kriss]

@doubar
You're very welcome!
As for the quote, I think that we just have the same point of view in this matter. That's why I was able to put in words what you are thinging, too.

[banmaixanh]

@doubar: It's sad but the life sometime we just don't have any other choice. It's really the bitter choice Sinbad was forced to take. And even it's not as emotion as what you use to write, it's better than the original version. I think you do right with changing from the 1st person into the 3rd person. It fits the context better, improve a lot the emotion in the story. If it was Sinbad who told about his own pain it must be deeper in emotion.

It has always bothered me quite a lot how quickly Sinbad gave up on Doubar during "The Beast of Basra", how he seemed to be all like "Well, my brother is a beast now, too bad but I need to kill him" (quoting inbid here for a moment)

I was going to tell you about this when you posted it the first time but then I was busy and I also gave you my thought in Welcome chat so I decided to not say it. But now you post it again so I just wonder how Sinbad should react? I actually see what happens in the show is enough and never require more. (I must re-watch this ep before I giving you my thought to see if my point of view is correct.) It's really hurt to see how Sinbad reacted when he recognized the beast was Doubar. The way he looked at the sea silently making the hardest choice of his life. Don't you see it's hurt?

And I hope to get back to my old writing self again soon.

What is your old writing self??

I was now writing about two men which makes it confusing at times to make clear who is being written about.

I have problem with it too when I write anything in English. It's so terrible when I use a lot of "she" and "her" in the story and then I don't know who is who. It's one of the reason I prefer to write my fic by Vietnamese.It's much easier to deal with such kind of things without disturbing or annoying the readers.
With this little shot, I must say because I read the draft before and I still remember it so it's easier to understand for me to find out who is mentioned.

[Doubar]

@ban: True that. Sometimes we have no chance but to take the bitter road.

Thank you for those lovely words. I know it's still not quite as emotional as the things I used to write, but I, too, think it's a lot better now than it was before. And that's exactly for the reason you mentioned, too - that, had this been told by Sinbad himself there would have needed to be a lot more hurt in this than what I put into it so far.

But now you post it again so I just wonder how Sinbad should react? I actually see what happens in the show is enough and never require more. (I must re-watch this ep before I giving you my thought to see if my point of view is correct.) It's really hurt to see how Sinbad reacted when he recognized the beast was Doubar. The way he looked at the sea silently making the hardest choice of his life. Don't you see it's hurt?

Hum, I guess for the first time my observing fails me then, because no, I never saw the hurt in Sinbad that I would have expected him to show. He does stare out on the horizon, and he's numb and aye, he does ache, but... his facial expressions just are a little bit too blank, and his desicion made too quickly. Maybe it's the contrast to Bryn that makes me feel like that. But you know, while Sinbad just instructs his crew to go and kill Doubar with him, Bryn refuses to give up. She runs off into the night and was clearly agitated when the Healer (forgot his name for a moment there) told her that Doubar might find redemption in a silver blade while Sinbad just accepts the inevitable.
So yeah, maybe that's why I was always a bit unsatisfied with the ep and the captain's reaction. You see - Bryn refuses to accept when she's only known Doubar for a couple of months and Sinbad, who has been raised by that man, just goes off to kill him. I can't really tell you what I would have expected exactly - maybe tears like in "Village Vanishes" - but I would have expected more than this.

What is your old writing self??

The one you described in our collab thread. ;D The one who thoroughly enjoys to write, who takes their readers on a journey she, herself, enjoys to go on. And the one who is able to pour a whole lot of emotions into something as simple as a written text.

I have problem with it too when I write anything in English. It's so terrible when I use a lot of "she" and "her" in the story and then I don't know who is who.

Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. I often try to replace all the "he" and "she" with the name or a description (like "the redhead", "the Celt", "the captain", "the younger man", etc) but there's a certain limitation to doing that when you try and convey a very personal point of view - even when you're writing in 3rd person. It's a problem I wouldn't get rid of in my own language though so it makes no difference which tongue I use.
But it's great to know that in Vietnamese there's more difference and that thus you have less troubles with this.

With this little shot, I must say because I read the draft before and I still remember it so it's easier to understand for me to find out who is mentioned.

Aw, now that is true. I suppose it is easier following the shot when you've read the first draft.

Again, thanx for having taken the time to read the edited version and share your thoughts on it with me. I really value that! <3

@teti: Awwww, thank you, dear, for taking the time to read and review despite of your exams coming closer. That really means a whole lot!

I'm so glad you think I depicted the brothers' bond well, and that Doubar - in some way - is still present in this.
Also, I'm super happy you appreciate my weaving this into the canon scenery. I must admit, at the moment I really like to work with given material ... helps me get over the blockage.

Again, thank you so much, dear, also for your wishes. <3 And all the best to you, too.

[Firouz]

Sorry, I was out of town and very busy the weekend and week before....


I think this holds a simplistic yet complex thought/feelings Sinbad has for his brother.

I think it's well written too.

It's simple, I think, because despite wanting Doubar to be well and whole again, Sinbad knew the demon Doubar was turning into her to be destroyed. He also knew that Doubar, himself, would wish Sinbad to end him because Doubar wouldn't want to harm anyone else by becoming the beast.

At the very base, it is a simple good verses evil-a very Sinbad-oriented theme.

But the complex feelings arise because their is that family bond that urges them to be together. To see each other through to the end...win or lose. It's there, the meaning hidden in the words. Sinbad's dependency on Doubar's adult presence. Doubar's ability to accept responsibility and let Sinbad grow into his own person at his own time. Sinbad's acknowledgement of guilt, undeserving as it is, for holding Doubar back from his own life is also a point of complexity.

I like it very much!

[Doubar]

Aww, thank you so much, Firouz. I appreciate it a lot that you took the time to read and review. It really means a lot. *hugs*

Indeed, in a way this is rather simplistic, isn't it? And you are right, it's Sinbad-oriented, too. There's only little complexity in this shot, though I'm glad I managed to at least add some more layers to the whole thing.

In the end I know this isn't exactly a masterpiece, and that one could do more with the topic, but still, of course, I am super happy you like it.

Again, and as always, thank you sooo much, dear. It means a whole lot.

[banmaixanh]

Apr 7, 2013 12:52:32 GMT -5 Doubar said:

He does stare out on the horizon, and he's numb and aye, he does ache, but... his facial expressions just are a little bit too blank, and his desicion made too quickly.

I always assume that he had stood there for a while before we saw him on the screen. And he had made that bitter choice before the scene I watch and the scene just to tell me what would happen next. So I don't mind about that thing happened so fast.

Maybe it's the contrast to Bryn that makes me feel like that. But you know, while Sinbad just instructs his crew to go and kill Doubar with him, Bryn refuses to give up. She runs off into the night and was clearly agitated when the Healer (forgot his name for a moment there) told her that Doubar might find redemption in a silver blade while Sinbad just accepts the inevitable.
So yeah, maybe that's why I was always a bit unsatisfied with the ep and the captain's reaction. You see - Bryn refuses to accept when she's only known Doubar for a couple of months and Sinbad, who has been raised by that man, just goes off to kill him. I can't really tell you what I would have expected exactly - maybe tears like in "Village Vanishes" - but I would have expected more than this.

In this case, well, you're right about Bryn's and Sinbad's reaction here. They're far different and it makes me annoyed too. I feel like they a bit over do with Bryn here. Her reaction is just too much I think. If someone who didn't believe in the truth, who tried to save Doubar it should be like you said that person should be Sinbad. But in this case, we can accept that Sinbad was lost in the pain of loosing his brother. He couldn't think clearly. So it's nicer to let the only woman in the crew found out the truth. Women are always more intelligent than the men so I think it is the good move. (it's better if that woman was Maeve). But the next move is very stupid. After knowing about the chance to have Doubar back, Bryn didn't tell Sinbad but went to find Doubar herself. She shouldn't have done that. Sinbad is Doubar's brother, he has his right to know that. What if she hadn't find Doubar before Sinbad did? What if Sinbad had killed Doubar before he knew about that chance?
You know what I expect that ep to be like? It was Maeve found out the chance to bring Doubar back. She told Sinbad and together they went to find Doubar and there was a little battle between them before Sinbad could bring Doubar back. As I told you above, Bryn should have told Sinbad and together they brought Doubar back instead of her run into the forest alone. But if it happened that way, there would have one more romantic scene between Bryn and Sinbad so it should be like what we see in the show or Maeve should have been there with Sinbad.

[Doubar]

Apr 12, 2013 11:20:14 GMT -5 banmaixanh said:

I always assume that he had stood there for a while before we saw him on the screen. And he had made that bitter choice before the scene I watch and the scene just to tell me what would happen next. So I don't mind about that thing happened so fast.

Wow, that actually never occured to me. ;D To me it always seemed rather rushed and somehow I didn't even consider the possibility that he's spent a long time thinking and battling with himself. But I agree, if we assume that we just didn't get to see his real inner struggle, then the scenery is not as bothersome anymore.

In this case, well, you're right about Bryn's and Sinbad's reaction here. They're far different and it makes me annoyed too. I feel like they a bit over do with Bryn here. Her reaction is just too much I think.

Hum, maybe not exactly too much but definitely flawed. I mean, it would make sense if this was somewhat at the end of the season and they had gone for a slowly developing Bryn/Doubar pairing, but indeed with only a few months having passed and Bryn and Sinbad being the ones who are about to ... well, whatever is it they were about to have... it just doesn't fit. Indeed she should have shared the info with Sinbad, although on the other hand I think she just wanted to be of help so badly that she didn't think straight anymore. I mean, if we think of how lost she still must be in her life what with her missing memory and her magic being pretty much a failure still, it seems well understandable that she was craving for being of use. And the fact that the Healer spoke to her so intently might well have made her think that she is indeed the Chaneller. Which again brings me back to thinking that it's not exactly Bryn who's overdone it, but Sinbad who's been given too little space to show his grief. The screenwriters certainly made up for that at the end with that amazing scene in which Sinbad completely forgets about his killing plan and becomes the Chaneller instead, but yeah... Anyway. I guess we can cut it down to: there's a dysbalance in Bryn's and Sinbad's reactions towards the curse and what it implies, and that dysbalance is what lures the watcher into feeling kinda unsatisfied.

You know what I expect that ep to be like? It was Maeve found out the chance to bring Doubar back. She told Sinbad and together they went to find Doubar and there was a little battle between them before Sinbad could bring Doubar back. As I told you above, Bryn should have told Sinbad and together they brought Doubar back instead of her run into the forest alone. But if it happened that way, there would have one more romantic scene between Bryn and Sinbad so it should be like what we see in the show or Maeve should have been there with Sinbad.

Aww, you know, I really like this idea with Maeve being the one to find out and tell Sinbad. It would have been a beautiful moment between them both - with Maeve giving him hope when he's already lost the same. Lovely thinking there, Ban!

[banmaixanh]

Wow, that actually never occured to me. ;D

;D ;D ;D I have this assumption because I've watched a lot of show like this. Whenever there is a character stands silently look at the horizon it means he/she is deeply sad, thinking about something which is very serious and he/she will make the very important decision.

I guess we can cut it down to: there's a dysbalance in Bryn's and Sinbad's reactions towards the curse and what it implies, and that dysbalance is what lures the watcher into feeling kinda unsatisfied.

Yeah, agree with you. It's because of the disbalance in their reactions. But I think we should understand the producers, there is only 40 minutes each ep, they don't have time to lengthen things. If it was an Asian tv show, I guess this problem would be solved in at least 10 eps since Asian focus a lot on the emotion, relationship, the fight inside the characters and so many other things. *shrugs*

Aww, you know, I really like this idea with Maeve being the one to find out and tell Sinbad. It would have been a beautiful moment between them both - with Maeve giving him hope when he's already lost the same. Lovely thinking there, Ban!

I wish we would have those scenes in the show. It would have created the very beautiful relationship between the two. But no matter, I bring those scenes in my stories. I don't have any romantic scenes in my fics but I have the other things. ;D

[Eric/Deamus]

just popped in there -FF- and see your new one
it's so lovely my dear,,,
R & R <3

[Doubar]

@ban: Aww, well, and it does fit the situation - looking out at the horizon when being deeply in thought. I guess I just didn't link it to his hurt and the awful choice he had to make. Or I was just too young to care/understand when I first saw the ep, and then never really made the effort to interpret the scene anew... I don't know.

But at any rate, I guess you're right in saying we should have some mercy on the producers. They had to make everything work out in only about 40 mins so maybe we can't blame them for not showing the emotional side of this more. The plot was important enough to develop over several eps, but since they only had one for that the emotional side had to be cut short somewhat.

I wish we would have those scenes in the show. It would have created the very beautiful relationship between the two. But no matter, I bring those scenes in my stories. I don't have any romantic scenes in my fics but I have the other things. ;D

Aww, indeed. Would have been great if we had such scenes in the show. And I am certain that I would have loved the way you would have portrayed their relationship. But at least we got fanfiction and there we can witness what you imagine for them.
Oh, but if you ask me, I would say you got very romantic scenes in your fics - it's just a different kind of romance than what most use/write about.

---

@teti: Awww, sweetheart, you're a star!!!! Thank you SO much for this lovely review!!!! *big, big hugs*
I really am glad you like my little experiment! It's been so long since I have last been able to convey emotions somewhat decently, so knowing you regard the descriptions as emotional and touching means a whole lot to me! And I really am happy that the part about the sea drew your attention like this. A personalization like this has every now and then been used before and I just really feel fascinated by the concept. Maybe, had I lived in those days and had I been a sailor, I, too, would have thought of the sea like that. =)

At any rate, aye: there's a certain kind of similarity, isn't there? Though I must admit this wasn't done on purpose, really. But true enough, Sinbad does seem to have a weakness for the complicated ones, those who don't just fall for him but who stand up to him.

And thanx for appreciating the insecurity I made him feel. As I wrote this, I had to realize that I had never given much thought on S1 Sinbad as I had mostly focused on what I imagine him to be like after S2. So there's not been a long thinking process before this fic, which again might lead to this contradicting with what others see in him. But knowing you think this to be okay really is nice!! <3

And last but not least, thank you so much for the hug!!! It's been indeed a whole while, and when I looked at the date of my last fic I went all wide-eyed, seeing it's been a month since then. But I think I made the right choice with having a break. I now don't feel as pressured anymore and if I write, then I only want to do it for the fun of it.

and i hope it takes you further in

Yeah, that would be nice indeed! I especially hope so in regards to "The Rise".

---

And for all those who now wonder what we're talking about: It appears I am back with a new little story. It's an experiment in many different ways: first, because I've never used 2nd person style before; 2nd because I've never written about S1 Sinbad before and 3rd because I've stayed pretty far away from writing in the last couple of weeks.
But some days ago I felt like trying something out and that's the result of it:

www.fanfiction.net/s/9277527/1/How-do-you-know

Whether it turned out to be good or not I will leave up to you. Fell free to give it a read, but don't feel forced to. I enjoyed writing this, and that's really all what counts for me at the moment.

[Doubar]

So... OMG, who would've thought this day would really come? O.O I posted the next chapter of The Rise for you! O.O

I don't know whether to be content with it or not. My block hit me right after the first part and it's been only a week since I took up working on it again. I have contemplated waiting with publishing till I'm back from my little holiday, but figured that most likely I wouldn't have the nerve anyway to really change something. I am aware some parts of this are far from perfect, and some things might even seem odd or OOC to you, but... it's all I can do for you guys at the moment.

So, despite some obvious flaws, I hope you still like the result.
And I hope you have fun reading.

Rise of the Phoenix: A new dawn

www.fanfiction.net/s/7477348/18/Rise-of-the-Phoenix



P.S.: Aye, I know the cover is just a rendering of that other fanart of mine, but I really couldn't be bothered making a new one. >.>

[Firouz]

WOW!
I LOVE how you described how Sinbad and Maeve's bodies ache with all they went through. How their emotions are so convoluted and complex and confusion that sometimes even they don't know what they are feeling.
I LOVE how the Phoenix confused Sinbad too by showing him Maeve and then 'taking' her away!
Maeve's guilt over accidentally leaving DimDim is SO her!
Also, the last line....Is DimDim a student of the phoenix or what? It's DimDim's most favorite/popular line of all!

[Doubar]

MJ: Thankees for the lovely review, dear!!!!! I'm glad you appreciate of this first part.

Heeehehe, and did you really think me to be this mean? Seperate them when they're soooooo close to finally being together again? I feel flattered. ;D But n'aw, couldn't do that. That would've been too evil. Even for my standarts. ;P

Thanx for appreciating of Maeve being slightly overwhelmed. I don't know if I had taken it all as well as she did - maybe I would have just turned into a crying mess the moment I saw those poeple again, but that would've been unfitting for her. So I rather had Sinbad notice and provide her with some subtle support. :3
Glad you like it!!!

@firouz: Aweee, thank you, too, deary, for the lovely review!!! I'm so super happy to know you liked the chapter.

I'm glad I could bring some of their inner turmoil across. I just assume that the whole situation must be almost surreal to them: they're still tired and worn out, but at the same time for the very first time in more than two years they have the chance to actually touch and just *be* together again... and then they still don't understand a thing and there's chance this might be just a dream (to them it must be like this anyway)... I hoped I could convey all this but didn't know whether it worked. But telling from your words it did, and that's just great!

Hehe, and as for the phoenix showing Maeve to Sinbad and then "taking" her away... I guess the poor bird wasnt even aware that he was giving Sinbad a wrong idea. But I realized that since it didn't really use a voice to speak, such kind of misinterpretation would have to be reckoned with and I quite liked the idea of Sinbad getting it that way so... I just went with the flow. ^^

Maeve's guilt over accidentally leaving DimDim is SO her!

I'm so happy you appreciate of this! Although I must confess I guess I'm heavily influenced by our Maeve's play here on DL. She just rp-s so brilliantly that her view on the Celt in many ways has become what I regard to be the truth about that character, and thus her feeling guilty for leaving DimDim behind just was something I felt I had to consider.

Now, as for the last line though... Well, of course there's a reason to why she says it. But what reason it is I won't share yet. You'll get to know in the last chapter (I think).

Again, thanx for taking the time to r&r. *hugs*

[Doubar]

Just added a pointless little ficlet to my Silent Joy series.

It's all but a masterpiece, but I enjoyed writing it and still like the mental image and idea behind it. Thus, I decided to put it up on FFN just in case someone else enjoys it, too.

Silent Joy - Weaving a Song

www.fanfiction.net/s/5957202/4/Silent-joy



P.S.: Sorry 'bout the exceptionally crappy and above recycled fanart... just can't be bothered making decent covers these days. >.>